Divorce can be one of the most traumatic events a family can go through. But while it is a painful process, there are ways to make everything that little bit easier. Below are some tips for helping you through the weeks and months to come.
You might be feeling overwhelmed, numb, or anxious—whatever you are feeling, you must give yourself time to process it. Your feelings are completely valid, and you should not expect too much of yourself too soon. Whether you need to have some time to yourself for a few days or indulge in a venting session with trusted friends, acknowledge how you feel and accept it is going to be difficult for a while.
Take things one day at a time and acknowledge your feelings as they arise. Suppressing your emotions will only make them worse, and it will take you longer to heal in the long term. Healing from divorce can take a while—don’t be hard on yourself.
As soon as possible, you should tell friends and family what is happening. Know that they are there to support you through times like this. You are not burdening them by asking for help or simply a sympathetic ear.
If you need help with moving, childcare or even accommodation, don't keep your worries to yourself. If you don't think you can face your ex-partner, but you need to collect belongings, ask someone to go with you, so you are not alone.
This is particularly important if you have children, who will be especially affected by all the changes going on around them. Go to work and social events as usual—it will take your mind off of everything and let you think more clearly. A routine also stops the divorce from affecting every area of your life.
If you are struggling, do not be afraid to take some time off or get extra help. It is important to look after yourself.
Try to see this painful time in your life as a chance to embrace a new hobby or activity. Take some time to enrich and develop yourself. You will feel more confident as a result, and it's something which you won't associate with your ex-partner. This can help you move on.
It is tempting to look for approval and validation when you are going through a divorce. However, this may cause more pain in the long term. Work on yourself and your own feelings before considering a new partner in your life, even if your ex-partner has someone new in theirs.
You will need to deal with the financial and legal realities of divorce, even if it's the last thing you feel like doing. Experienced family divorce lawyers and divorce mediation specialists can help you through every stage of the process. This includes everything from working out your finances to choosing the right course of action.
Mediation is perhaps the most effective, quickest and cheapest way of handling a separation if you and your partner can have a civil discussion. Experienced specialists will sit in and ensure both parties are heard fairly.
If you are going through a divorce or separation, or need advice on finding lawyers and mediators in your area, download our free e-book today. This process does not have to be ugly when you are working with lawyers you can trust.